Here is the story of my journey. It is rather a long one, but I want to share this with you. Actually, the fact that I am sharing this with you is a great accomplishment in and of itself. Here goes!
It all started when I was in the 5th or 6th grade. My school made the decision (a horrible one, in my opinion :-D) to be involved in the ever-so-lovely Presidential Physical Fitness Program. I cannot begin to tell you how much I hated physical activity. Granted, I never minded swimming, riding my bike or rollerblading, but anything else was just grotesque to me. Let's put it this way, I would much rather sit in a class lecture or have choir for three hours than have gym class. I was the book worm, school lover, and fine-arts dreamer. Exercising was never an option for me. YUCK. So, anyways, this fitness program. Part of the program was the DREADED and HELLISH mile run. I had NEVER ran a mile before. Needless to say, it took me a little over 20 minutes to run the mile run. EVERYBODY was waiting for me on the bus. EVERYBODY was staring at me as I got on the bus to find an empty seat. I was scarred for life.
Thankfully, in the years following, I was able to run a mile in about 11:30...not bad considering the first time. That still did not even convince me one iota to get physically fit.
When I started high school, I noticed that I was not going to be one of those girls who would be the stick-thin-perfect body-size zero girl. I had hips, thighs and the ever wonderfully inherited Italian gluteus maximus...emphasis on the MAX. To me, I only had two options: starve myself and talk about calories like other girls or eat. Exercising never was an option. Well, I can't starve myself. I live to eat. Many wonderful memories in my life include food. I was pretty much fine in high school: I could eat a huge Friendly's burger and fries, top it off with a sundae and lose a couple pounds in the process. Then...I started college...
I actually didn't really have a problem with the Freshman fifteen. Shock of all shocks, I went to the gym sometimes! But nothing long lasting. It was more of a "I'm a cool Freshman. I work out!" kind of thing. Then my sad sophomore year. I fell for a guy my Freshman year. Fell hard. I had never had feelings like that for someone before. If he had asked me to marry him, I would have said "yes." Something happened over the summer before my sophomore year. I honestly have no idea what it was. Because there was no closure or explanation, I went into a tale spin of emotions. Food became my comfort. And not healthy food. I spent lots of money on fast food and dessert. The Freshman fifteen most likely became the Sophomore twenty plus.
After my sophomore year, I enrolled in a famous program that has you count points for your meals. I was embarrassed. It did work for me though, but only while I was living at home. My mom was very supportive and helped me with the right foods, but you all know that college food is anti-points. I was pretty strict with myself at school. Only problem was that even with strict portion control, my points would be used up at one meal, so I would go hungry the rest of the day. That didn't last long, because, well it was seriously depressing. Thankfully, I managed to keep some weight off my Junior year.
Then, I met Joe. My wonderful and amazing husband. OOO!!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!! He was the first guy that I couldn't really eat in front of. I always ate with gusto around my guy friends, but Joe was different. I was so nervous and beyond excited all the time, that I just always felt full. But, we all know that that was the newness of the relationship talking. Once that wore off, eating was no problem. Haha.
The summer right before our Senior year of college, I went to the United Kingdom for eight weeks with a drama group. We spent half the time in England and half the time in Scotland. The amount of cookies (biscuits to them), shortbread (oh that sweet buttery goodness), shepherd's pie, and desserts with cream poured over them added to my buttery goodness. That was hard. I felt like I took a step backwards in my weight loss. After all I was going to be getting married in about a year!!!
My Senior year of college, I was so busy. I had my Senior project and a wedding to plan, and I started the birth control pill. Now for me, the pill makes me lose weight! Yes, ladies, I lose weight on the pill. Don't be jealous though, because it was so not healthy. I lost about thirty pounds! I looked AMAZING on my wedding day. I was so thin! I mean, it was exhilarating! Joe wasn't too thrilled. He said it was because I didn't eat anything, but the pill suppresses my appetite, and all-in-all, I was thin!!! I could care less how it happened!
Well...it didn't last long. By the time I was married three years, I was the heaviest I had ever been. Even when I had my gallbladder removed at 23 years old, it still didn't motivate me to get healthy or AT LEAST try and do some physical exercise.
Then I moved to Arizona. I started to lose weight. Then I got pregnant. Haha. I ended up having some serious complications during labor and delivery and had to have a c-section. And God was more than gracious and allowed me to lose ALL of my pregnancy weight and then some! My labor and delivery experience started to get me thinking about getting in shape. Joe was always telling me that getting fit and exercising is WAY more important than just trying to be thin. But, I can come up with excuses at the drop of a hat, so nothing ever came to fruition.
Then came 2012. We had some friends live with us for a couple of weeks. They had just moved to Arizona and were looking for apartments. In the meantime while having a blast, we ate. And I mean ate. My Joe is really disciplined when it comes to eating, and he would much rather have a second helping of dinner than dessert. I like eating dessert with people...eases the guilt. Haha. Well, one of our friends LOVES dessert too, and he quickly became my dessert buddy. And my snack buddy, and my let's just throw caution to the wind and eat buddy. Well, the waistbands in some of my clothes were starting to feel a tad on the snug side. I knew I couldn't blame this on being bloated. Yes, I have done that before.
Ironically, one night (probably while the four of us were consuming two pounds of bacon...no I'm not exaggerating, and it would be dishonest saying Evie had some too, because one slice out of two pounds of bacon really isn't making a dent) we discussed exercising. Our two friends look great. They are fit and exercise regularly. I was sharing how I am extremely, and I mean EXTREMELY embarrassed for people to know and see me exercising. I feel as if I'm wearing a sign that says "I'm a fattie!" I used this fear as an excuse. To borrow a line from the great Yoda, "Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering." Whoever says Star Wars doesn't have great life lessons is clearly clueless. I'm getting away from myself. I honestly don't exactly remember what was said after I shared my feelings of embarrassment, but whatever it was, it stuck with me.
I began to seriously think about starting a regimen. I knew exactly which one too. I first heard about it a couple years ago from my sister Jeanne. It's called Couch to 5k. Yes, 5k. It is a nine week program. You run three times a week and build up endurance and speed to run a 5k in thirty minutes. I got my sedentary self off the couch one morning and started the program. First week of February. The program has you run three times a week. Every workout starts with a five minute warm-up of fast walking and ends with a five-minute cool down of slow walking. In the middle you do a series of running for a certain amount of time and walking a certain amount of time. The first week involved running for a minute, then walking for 1:30. I swear the running is WAY LONGER than the walking. I was heaving and hoing after those one minute runs. It also didn't help that Evie would not stop saying "hi" to me until I said "hi" back. I remember finishing the first week and telling Joe, that I am HIGHLY skeptical that I will be able to run thirty minutes straight. I mean let's be honest...what a joke! I soon realized that running with Evie was not helping. I had to wait until she got up and ate and all that, and by the time I got outside, it was late in the morning. Easy way for me to make excuses. SO...brace yourselves again...I set my alarm! YES, I SET MY ALARM! I started getting up at 7:00 AM Monday, Wednesday and Friday and doing that darned program. Every week the periods of running got longer. Running without Evie was a good idea, but continuing to run with my Walmart sneakers was NOT. They were basically plastic socks. By week four, my achilles tendons were KILLING me. I was hobbling all over the place. I about fell over when I would step out of bed. Time to get some running shoes. Now, I have never been athletic, so I never really invested in good athletic shoes. So, one night, Joe, me Evie and my grandma went to a sneaker store. I was expecting to pay $40 or $50 for a pair of running shoes. Those of you who know me would have loved to see the expression on my face when I saw the $135 price tag. "HOLY CRAP!" I said to Joe. He started laughing. I was determined though to be cheap. Now the crafty saleswoman had me try on a cheaper shoe on one foot with a more expensive shoe on another foot. She kept changing them out until I was wearing the $135 pair of sneakers. I swear it was like walking on a cloud. I had no idea shoes could feel that great. My husband was ready to pay the price. He knew that the hefty price tag would motivate me to keep up with the program. Thankfully, they had one pair of last year's model in my size, so that night I became the proud owner of a pair of Brook's running shoes. I have never looked back. My achilles tendons issues went away after a week, and I have never had a problem since.
Fast forward to Friday, April 13. The end of the program. Week 9, Day 3. I did it. I actually did it. Brace yourselves folks...I CAN RUN FOR THIRTY MINUTES STRAIGHT! Yes, you read that right. I CAN RUN FOR THIRTY MINUTES STRAIGHT! And I'm not going to stop there. I'm going to continue running for 30 minutes three times a week. Who knows? Maybe I will try and train for a 10k. Why stop now?
This journey would not have been possible without Jesus. He knows me better than anyone. He has put up with my excuses over the years. He has put up with me not taking care of myself. He has patiently and quietly listened to my pleas/prayers for strength and endurance as I have been running the past nine weeks (I bet it amused Him too :-)). He is the one who made the change in me to actually get off the couch and run. He gave me my Joe and my sister Jeanne...my soundboards and cheerleaders throughout this process. He gave me the strength. He gave me the ability TO RUN.
